Love and...

Call me a blasphemer or whatever- but I'm really starting to doubt this social institution we call Marriage- why do you have to get married? I mean, to be honest, its just signing a document and saying yep- we are legal recognized as a unit. So why do you have to have a paper to say that? Now, I know that this view is not shared by my partner, but damnit. This is what I think.

On another note- I also get deathly afraid of losing the independence and freedom I have now- it's almost as if people buy into the social construction of marriage and "change" after they get married (ok, I can think of a few cases where this isn't true...but those are far and few between). Previously independent women get married- and fall into the mold of the wife- the stereotypical role, I must add.  And of course, things aren't made easier when all the people around you are getting married............bah- why?

My Bad Habit....

I am decided that my worst habit is that I do not hide the mood I'm in....... I have decided that this is a bad thing to others, not necessarily myself.

Also, on a side note, there is a point at which I get frustrated with adjusting and adjusting and making changes- how far do you bend and mold a person until they break...and I can tell you, in my resistance to breaking- I crack open- I vent my frustrations....and then realize that I'm not getting sympathy....

on the verge...

do you ever have the feeling that you are on the verge of something, but not sure what? I have this odd twitch, itch, twinge that just keeps telling me something is about to happen but I'm clueless as to what....