Living with Other People

So I figured it was about time I started an entry about this oh-so lovely topic. I live with three people, all female, and I can say that two of my roomates, I really like a lot. The last one...I can't FREAKIN' stand. I've come to realize how small things about a person can add up to a lot. I had never really had such problems with a roomate before. My freshman year, despite our different backgrounds and way of looking at the world, D'ann and I got along great! She remained a close friend of mine even when we were not rooming together anymore (and we weren't rooming together anymore because she moved off campus and I stayed on). My second roomate was the problem though. She was a BITCH and a TYRANT. I swear, I had to wonder if that girl ever left the fucking room. She really didn't bother me all that much because I was hardly ever in the room (I was taking 17 hours in the Fall and 16 in the Spring plus the RA course....and of course, I was heavily involved). But, when I was in the room, like at night- because lo and behold, this girl went to bed at 10pm.......WHO IN COLLEGE GOES TO BED AT THAT TIME???? I guess I was stupid and should have gotten the clue that she goes to bed that early- and doesn't wake up until 10 the next day. I had never known someone to sleep so much (well, I take that back...the Disliked Roomate sleeps alot). I tried to be nice to her and she responded like a bitch. I'm sure part of it would be that she would make a statement, and I would ask "well, why do you feel that way?" (I think my favorite was when

she said "Bush is a dumbass"
Me:"Ok thanks for stating the obvious, but why?"
Her response: "UGH! He just is"
Me: That's not going to win you any debates...

I admit, that was a bit of a smart ass thing for me to do......but hey, that's life. I think the main problem was that our personalities were so different. Somehow, deep down inside, I think she is a recovering Goth. It just struck me that way.

So we parted ways, and from then on out, the rest of my time at A&M, I lived in a single room, but I had suitemates, so it was a little like living in an apartment. My suitemate my senior year was amazing! She was funny, crazy, and just plain fun.

My roomates last year at VT were great. Tiffany is definitely missed! So now this brings me to my Disliked Roomate (DR). I thought DR and I would get along- she had had similar experiences to mine and she was studying in a related field. That's where they stop though. Homegirl obviously has not had responsibilty before. She was able to spend her undergraduate days galavanting around the world, which is nice, but then you tell other people they should do the same thing? Some of us have RESPONSIBILITIES! like jobs, school, and not enough money. I shudder to think that being a TA at VT is your first REAL work experience. (and please, teaching English in another country is NOT a job- and the people who hire you to do it know that, they know you are only doing it so you can travel to another country with a pretense). And when you talk about traveling, please don't act like no one else has done it. Dont' patronize me or talk down to my friends, especially since some of them have a hell lot more experience than you. (Especially, as I see it, you go to foreign countries, spend +1 month there, and don't even learn the language??? My Spanish is better than yours and FUCK you were in India in a program where you learn Hindi and you didn't even pick that up....are you really an "international" traveler or just an American tourist?) But yeah, Patronizing tone ANY time you talk to her. And it also shows when she'll come back from a hike and say "wow, you really should go.." Pardon me for the piles of book and computer I am sitting at doing WORK. You came to grad school to work and learn some professionalism. Are you just here to play? because I can tell you, that ain't going to get you a job, especially in your field (look at your loser no-personality boyfriend...what is he doing? working for Blacksburg???) Oh and my favorite is when DR made the comment "OH! someone's being domestic today!" the first time she saw me cooking at home. EXCUSE ME?!? Just because I am cooking a meal for myself does not mean I'm "domestic" i means I can provide and take care of myself, which is the least I can say for you (Yeah, do I need to remind you that the one attempt you had at cooking dinner, I ended up having to cook for you??) I really get annoyed with these "feminists" who think that cooking dinner, knowing how to do any so-called "domestic" tasks- makes you less of a "strong woman." Face the facts- you have to know how to do some of these things in life, otherwise you will end up asking for help all the time. And besides, as a feminist, I do advocate women being able to do all these things, not so much for their husband, but for themselves. (And honestly, if you can cook well, you can def. have control over your man).

So what else does Homegirl do? Does not lift a finger to help in the maintenance of the apartment (I actually think that this is where most of my ire perpetuates from)- I have never once seen her clean our bathroom or the living room, or even take out the trash for that matter. I think the worst was when right before Thanksgiving Break she and I said "ok, we're cleaning this this weekend." Guess who got stuck with it....yeah that's right...me. And who kept walking by and not offering to help, and even went as far as to idiotically say "oh wow, someone's on a cleaning spree!" Oh Bitch...no. And EVEN more did not even take the trash that was by the door out when she went to take a bag of trash from her room that wasn't even a quarter full (this brings me to another point- she has all these obnoxious "my carbon footprint is smaller than yours" type deals- WHY THE HELL are you throwing out a half-filled garbage bag....isn't that just making more trash (in the form of another plastic bag)- fucking hypocrites). So when Homegirl realizes I'm pissed, she comes up to me and says "I really appreciate you doing this.." FUCK no you don't. You just like the fact that someone else is doing it. To which I just looked at her and thought about what to say- be a bitch or be diplomatic. I think I took the middle road and said "yeah, hopefully it will stay clean" Her: (laugh that sounds like a damn cough (she does this alot when she talks and it sounds like she is hyperventilating and its annoying too)): Oh I'm sure it will.

Will it bitch? Last I checked, you aren't doing anything to make sure it stays clean. For some reason, more than any other roomate, this girl pisses me the hell off. I honestly think alot of it has to do with the maturity level- she's still a kid at the age of 23. I have no problem with acting immature and having fun, but I also realize there is a time and place for that.

Whew- rant over. I feel like punching her face now.

The God of Small Things

More and more, I read people's facebook or blog or orkut that say one of their favorite books is The God of Small Things. And some of the people I know who have this book listed as their favorites I know hardly understand the nuances Arundhati Roy includes in this novel or fully grasp what exactly she is writing between the covers. Amazon's review states:

"In her first novel, award-winning Indian screenwriter Arundhati Roy conjures a whoosh of wordplay that rises from the pages like a brilliant jazz improvisation. The God of Small Things is nominally the story of young twins Rahel and Estha and the rest of their family, but the book feels like a million stories spinning out indefinitely; it is the product of a genius child-mind that takes everything in and transforms it in an alchemy of poetry. The God of Small Things is at once exotic and familiar to the Western reader, written in an English that's completely new and invigorated by the Asian Indian influences of culture and language."

What this fails to mention, however, is that Roy, herself, has been a prolific writer, mostly on issues of societal, cultural, and political concern. Some of these concerns are alluded to throughout the course of the novel. Environmental concerns are addressed in the manner in which she describes the pollution in the river, caused by pesticides bought with loans from the World Bank (also, in this addressing the impact of globalization on the environment), but also in the means of how she juxtaposes the life of the family with that of Velutha's- which is arguably more attuned with and at one with, nature.

The obvious "point" that people pull from this novel is the discussion of caste and the separation of people, whom love each other, because of this system. However, it is not so simplistic. It also concerns not only a division on caste, but also class, and societal affiliations. Velutha, an untouchable, laborer, with affiliations to the Communist Party, does not seem to mix with the idea of what the "respectable" Christian, middle class wants. It is not, then, just a caste issue. Overall, Roy is utilizing this family to critique the Christian community in Kerala, not just as a reiteration of what so many other writers have commented on in the past. To simplify her points to only being about caste neglects the complexity of the novel and the complexity of Roy's arguments on the positions she takes in real life.

The Amazon review states that this would be a great read and not hard to understand for English readers (read: Western readers) however, I would also argue that so much of the context and points of the story are lost because of the failure to fully understand and take into consideration the rich social fabric Arundhati Roy composes in this novel.

Perhaps, this can shed a little more light on who Arundhati Roy is and some of the issues she addresses within God of Small Things, in a way that weaves into a stirring story. In her own words, it is about power and power relations and her way of seeing.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YZ2as-l_LSk&feature=related

Lost

Do you ever have those days where you wonder what you are doing and how you got to where you are...and you just feel lost and don't know what to do next- yeah, i'm having one of those days. It just makes me wonder what I'm doing and if what I felt like is what I wanted to do all along, really what I want to do?

So yeah, there's always that cliche that life is a journey and sometimes you get lost- but damn, it does not feel good sometimes to be lost- and with no direction to home.

The Bloody Fucking Double Standard

I don't ask for much, but there are certain things that when others expect them of me, I would hope they would do the same. For example, I like to study with music- but if someone comes over and I know they may not like studying to the music I like, I turn it off- or they turn it off themselves, and I make no protest. Go to their house and it is a totally different story- you want to watch some children's movie because you are thinking about your niece- ok...fine! BUT CAN'T YOU FUCKING WAIT UNTIL I LEAVE (which would be about 5 minutes later). The list goes on- you have a bad day-you are allowed that, but when I'm in a mood- it's as if I commit some crime- I know you are smarter than to make a comment that will further piss me off- seriously, if you think what I do is so easy, you do it. I've seen the way you write- you would have a hard time doing what I do- let alone understanding what I have to read- it's all relative my dear. Einstein was a great theorist on that- but it seems to have passed your notice.

Or...let's say, with blogs- you make damn well sure I read your blog, but I don't even think you give mine a passing glance...all the better for me I suppose- although a post like this may not be made public...or if it is...well.....you probably still wouldn't notice.

And please, don't play the martyr with me- it wiill not get you my sympathy nor win you any points...or leverage against me for that matter- whatever you have done in the past- hardly is made up for sometimes. And the fact you keep me dangling and make remarks that I can't stand- I make comments and it's as if I killed your mother (let's not mention when I say "your mom!"- as if it is worse than the disrespect you show your own mother sometimes. So please, don't lecture me.

Oh, and your two more years of life, certainly do not qualify you for anything special. And for someone who has seen more people in this world- you sure don't seem to be able to handle them well- or communicate- or get along with anyone. YOu were in Germany for a year and you only have 4 friends from that? and you are in Tennessee for 6 months, and do not make any friends but the people you live with? and then you place the blame on them- obviously, something is fucked up in your brain.

How much more can I write? Probably a novel. On nights like tonight, I just don't want to deal with you. I send you a message asking how your work is going, and you don't respond. Not my problem. I'll just go to friend's houses and see people that I feel would be more worth my while to see- while you wallow in your self-pity.